Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Blinders

The other day I was bemoaning my state to a group of colleagues when one of them changed the subject to mutual acquaintance who was in a similar, if not worse state than I am. It was time for me to go anyway, but I sort of made a joke of it and said that I only had time for my own problems. The group cracked up alughing at that, and I made my exit. The only problem is that I was being toally serious. I just have too much going on right now. I have never been so stressed out. Every day something happens that brings me to the brink, and then I just feel the tears welling up. The other day I was sitting at the kitchen design center in Lowes when B called to tell me that his parents, who have been caring for Boh-Me, were bringing him to he kennel because he is too high maintennce and cries at night. Then my mother beeped in to say that the landlord came over and saw Andycat and said he had to go. And then I just started crying, for no reason and for every reason.

SO when I hear people, even my mother, talking about this or that problem with the house or the CBD, or this or that favorite restaurant or whatever, I just shut down. I don't even hear them talking. I guess I am listening, though I would never be able to repeat anything from the converstation.

I don't watch the news anymore. Is New Orleans still in the news? I sure feel all alone down here.

3 Comments:

At 8:42 PM, Blogger Claire said...

I've been reading your blog for quite awhile now as you're honestly one of my favorite poets, and I've followed your posts closely since the storm. I sincerely hope you know some relief soon.

 
At 3:25 PM, Blogger Mary said...

Alison, are you receiving mail yet?

 
At 12:07 PM, Blogger Alison P. said...

Mary--

Sometimes yes, sometimes non. (PS--love that picture of you on the crapper)

 

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